Though paralyzed, still radiantly charming!

Chapter 248: Because… I want to see you smile

Ryan was pinned down, unable to move, and it was clear something was off with Miss Alice.

If it had been Mia or someone else, he wouldn’t have felt this awkward. If a little devil like Mia took advantage of him, he could just laugh it off.

But being this close to Miss Alice made him feel guilty, like he was defiling something pure, like a lotus in a pond.

Especially now, after Alice had downed two beers, her face flushed red. She wasn’t just tipsy—she was definitely a little drunk.

Taking advantage of her now, even though it might feel good, would be wrong, right? That would be taking advantage of her in a vulnerable state.

No, no, absolutely not.

[Alice Mood Level – 10, Current: 10/100 (Special State)]

The system notification chimed in at just the right moment, and Ryan’s face grew even more troubled.

Did he really need a notification for this? Even without the system, he could tell Alice wasn’t in the right state of mind.

Ryan struggled hard, trying to free himself, but this only made Alice more upset.

Her hands shot out like iron clamps, gripping his wrists. Her eyes were slightly hazy, and after a brief moment of thought, she shoved Ryan’s arms between her legs, pinning them down completely.

Damn.

Ryan wasn’t clueless about these things. His hands were pressed against something soft and full, and he didn’t dare move an inch.

“Explain. I want to hear your explanation.”

Seeing Ryan stop struggling, Alice seemed to relax a little. Of course, she thought, the only way to keep Ryan was to use force. That was the only thing that gave her peace of mind.

Sure, Ryan was helping her right now, but that felt so uncertain. Especially after seeing Mia today, Alice’s sense of insecurity had skyrocketed.

Ryan could help her, but he could also help others. That was Ryan’s choice. But Alice didn’t want him to have that freedom. She wanted all of his care and attention for herself.

Why didn’t Ryan push Mia away? Couldn’t he see through her?

“There’s nothing to explain…”

Ryan turned his head, avoiding Alice’s gaze. He admitted that he had been a little selfish in how he handled things earlier, but Alice’s assumptions were way off.

He had hit Marco’s guys partly out of impulse, but also because it was part of his plan.

There were a lot of people filming at the time, and Ryan knew he wouldn’t be able to get the footage back on his own. If Alice had been there, maybe they could’ve salvaged the situation, but she hadn’t arrived yet.

So, he needed someone else with enough power to step in—Marco.

When Ryan had fought those thugs, he’d made sure to shout Marco’s name. There was a good chance that the workers filming had caught that on camera.

In the underworld, mentioning a gang leader’s name was a big deal. If Marco was smart, he wouldn’t ignore this. He’d retrieve the phones and destroy the footage.

And if Marco didn’t do that, Ryan’s actions would at least show that Alice wasn’t on the same side as the people who had attacked. It would help clear her name.

Ryan had calculated all of this, and yes, he had kept it from Alice. But how did that amount to self-sabotage?

“You’re not going to explain? Fine, I’ll do it for you.”

Alice had had enough of Ryan’s vague responses. She tightened her grip, almost crushing his shoulders.

[Alice Mood Level – 5, Current: 5/100 (???)]

Ryan considered himself someone who could handle pain, but under Alice’s pressure, he was starting to feel like he might confess to anything just to make it stop.

She’d been like this once before, in a similar situation. They had been alone in a themed hotel room, and Alice had lost control of her emotions while talking about something personal.

Back then, Ryan had managed to calm her down with a kiss.

But this time, a kiss wasn’t going to cut it. Hadn’t she just asked, “Why are you being so nice to me?”

If he kissed her now, he’d never be able to explain himself.

“Miss Alice, it’s not—”

“You’re not allowed to talk!”

Before Ryan could finish his sentence, Alice clamped her hand over his mouth. Her small, pale hand covered his lips, and no matter how much he mumbled, she wouldn’t let go.

“You hit Marco’s guys. Maybe you were trying to force Marco to act. I bet that’s what you’re going to say.”

Alice’s words hit like a bombshell. Ryan went silent, staring at her in disbelief.

“You’re not wrong to think that way. But did you ever consider what Marco might do after he collects the footage? Do you really think none of his people were among those workers?”

“They could easily edit the video, make it look like you were the one who started the fight.”

Alice spoke slowly, each word sharp and precise. You had to give her credit—her mind was incredibly sharp.

Even though she had only heard secondhand accounts of what had happened, she had already pieced together the risks and consequences with just a few sentences.

Ryan’s eyes darted around, trying to find a way to counter Alice’s argument, but he couldn’t. She was right—Marco wouldn’t have let things slide without some kind of backup plan.

“They were coming for me originally, and you jumped in to take the heat. If that’s not self-destructive, then what is?” Alice pressed, her logic so clear that Ryan couldn’t argue. Looking at it from her perspective, it did seem like he had taken the hit for her.

Ryan fell silent. He had underestimated the situation, and Alice, seeing him stop resisting, grew more confident. She was becoming more convinced that she was right.

Ryan wanted to help her, but at the same time, it seemed like he didn’t care about his own life. That was the conclusion Alice had drawn from reading Ryan’s journal.

It was the same when he took that bullet for her. Ryan probably thought that if he died, it wouldn’t matter, as long as Alice was safe. And now, with the video situation, if it went viral, the public’s anger would be directed at Ryan, allowing Alice to escape the crisis.

But what was his endgame?

Alice couldn’t figure it out. Ryan was willing to sacrifice his life for her, yet he didn’t ask for anything in return. It didn’t fit into her understanding of the world.

“Ryan, why are you helping me?”

“I was the one who kidnapped you in the first place. Don’t you hate me, even a little?”

“You could’ve had a normal life with Anna. But now, because of me, that’s impossible. Don’t you resent me at all?”

Alice finally let go of Ryan’s mouth. She had been covering his nose too, and Ryan almost choked from the lack of air. He gasped for breath, taking in deep gulps of oxygen.

Anna? What does Anna have to do with this?

First Mia, now Anna—did Miss Alice think he had some weird relationship with them? That was obviously not the case.

“Resentment? I mean, sure, maybe a little… but it’s not that big of a deal.”

“Then why are you staying by my side?”

Alice’s delicate face could no longer maintain its composure. She grabbed Ryan by the collar, her voice trembling. This was the question she had been dying to ask, and now she couldn’t hold it in any longer.

Whether it was Anna showing up before or Mia’s current involvement, both had shaken Alice’s sense of security.

She was truly scared—terrified that Ryan might suddenly leave her.

Ryan wanted to die. What if he left her through death? What would she do then?

“No, no… I can’t let that happen.”

This was a pivotal moment. How Ryan answered would determine the future of their relationship.

Alice held her breath, anxiously waiting for his response.

In her emotional state, she couldn’t control her expression. Her face was flushed red, and if you looked closely, you could see a tear glistening at the corner of her eye.

Ryan stared at her, stunned. He hadn’t expected Alice to cry.

She shouldn’t have any expectations anymore. Expectations only lead to disappointment—she knew that all too well.

She had once hoped for a happy, fulfilling life. But when that woman left, saying those unforgettable words, Alice had felt nothing but despair.

Wrapping herself in coldness, keeping others at a distance—it was all to avoid getting hurt again.

She had probably grown used to being alone. If Ryan hadn’t shown up, maybe she wouldn’t have become this… strange.

“I must seem so weird to you, right? Asking questions like this. I must seem really weird.”

“Is that what you think of me too?”

She wanted to just shoot Ryan right then and there. Maybe that would allow her to return to her calm, detached self. But she couldn’t do it.

Kill Ryan, then kill herself? Was that really the best option?

“What do you want from me? Ask me for something, anything. I’ll give it to you.”

The girl waited for Ryan’s answer. He could easily come up with some excuse to get out of this, but this time, looking into her hopeful eyes, he hesitated.

And in that moment of hesitation, he instinctively opened his mouth and said something that would make him cringe with embarrassment later.

“Because… I want to see you smile.”

“That’s it?”

“That’s it…”

“You idiot…”