This World Has Gone Crazy

Yi Hang jumped from the flower bed and rushed over quickly. Qi Le’s first reaction was to run, but he soon thought that according to the idiot’s character, he would continue to him chase all the way to the classroom, then suddenly say something that shouldn’t be heard by Wan Lei, prompting the man to discover the truth of the matter. And Wan Lei would probably hit him in the head after being unable to take the blow. As a result, he would be in a miserable state. He stood silently, taking a look at Lu Yanbin who followed him. In order to make this idiot disappear from sight, the best way was to help the man bring his wife home.

Yi Hang had no idea what he was going to do. He stared at him. “Was your phone stolen?”

“...” Qi Le said, “...Huh?”

“Don’t pretend. I already know.” Yi Hang recounted the matter briefly. “Even if he wasn’t a thief, I think he regretted it at the end and decided not to return it to you.” He snorted, somewhat gloating. “This shows that you there’s something wrong with your character. You deserve your bad luck. This is the retribution for scheming and getting the idiot doctor to pester me...” Before his words were done, he only heard the ringing of someone’s cellphone. Clearly, it came from the man before him. He couldn’t help but pause slightly.

Qi Le calmly picked up the call. It was Gu Bai. He asked if he had arrived at school. Qi Le answered, hung up, then looked at a certain someone with an innocent expression. “What did you say?”

Yi Hang, “...”

Yi Hang stared at the object he had in his hand; it didn’t look like a new purchase. He took a moment to react and became angry. “The man returned it to you? Then you turned off your phone after?!"

“...No.” Qi Le said earnestly, “He had already made more than ten phone calls along the address book to contact me before you called. My phone was running out of battery. When I got to the place we had agreed on to pick up the phone, it had already automatically turned off.”

Yi Hang nodded understandably, somewhat moved. “Looks like there are still really good people in this world.”

“...Mmm, so you have to have hope.” Qi Le encouraged, and patted him on the shoulder. In order to stop the man from thinking about yesterday’s matter, he quickly changed the subject. “What’s going on with you two? Did you argue?”

“Who argued with him?!” Yi Hang muttered, “I don’t know him at all, and I don’t care to argue with him. I should have died. I came here to die.”

Qi Le looked at Lu Yanbin, his lips twitching slightly. “Why don’t you tell me.”

Lu Yanbin calmly narrated. “Yesterday, I...”

“Shut up!” Yi Hang quickly interrupted him. He was deeply humiliated by the matter. He thought about it and asked Qi Le indignantly, “Laozi sent him a gift because I was concerned about his body. I hoped that he would like it. Tell me, is that wrong?”

Lu Yanbin, “......”

“No.” Qi Le spoke truthfully. “People who give gifts generally have this expectation.”

“Exactly.” Yi Hang grew more angry. “Never mind if he doesn’t like it, but at least he shouldn’t be so obvious. Yet he actually threw it away in front of me! Laozi spent thousands ah, but my sincerity has been tossed by him, just like that. If it were you, how would you feel? “

Qi Le thought for a moment. “What was the gift?”

Yi Hang hesitated. “Shouldn’t you be on my side at this time and scold him for his heartless wastrel?”

Yes, I might really think so if it were someone else, but the subject is you... Qi Le blinked. “I have to ask first. If your gift violates his taboos, you can’t blame him, can you?”

Yi Hang, “...”

“What was the gift?”

Yi Hang was very guilty and his eyes were wandering all over the place. Lu Yanbin, who was beside him, said calmly, “An inflatable doll customized according to his appearance and figure. Even the voice was recorded by himself and it starts screaming as soon as the sensor is triggered.”

Qi Le, “......”

Fucking hell, you can really come up with ideas. Between a doll and the real person, who do you think he will choose? Qi Le glanced at the exposed skin on someone’s neckline, curved his lips and looked at Lu Yanbin. “Then you threw it away?”

“He wouldn’t let me throw it. He asked me what I wasn’t satisfied with. He said he could get the factory to change it,” said Lu Yanbin. “Then I said to him...”

Yi Hang immediately became angry from embarrassment. “Shut up!”

Lu Yanbin looked at him. “I was telling the truth yesterday. The sounds you made weren’t right.”

“So if it was wrong, does that make it ok for you to push me to bed and do that?"

Lu Yanbin calmly reminded, “You were the one who asked me how you should sound. I told you that it should sound like you do when we slept together the other day day, but you didn’t know.”

“Bullshit!” Yi Hang paced back and forth. “I cried out to porn for two hours yesterday until my voice was almost hoarse. Even I felt that I was being such a slut, but you still said it wasn’t good enough. You’re deliberately putting my patience to the test so that I would say ‘why don’t you fuck me again?’ to satisfy you once more, am I right?!"

“No, the sounds you made were really off.”

“That’s bullshit!”

Lu Yanbin calmly pulled out his phone, found the audio and played it. A certain someone’s coy voice rang out. “Ya~ me~ te... Ungh... ungh... ah... Ya~ me~ te~ Ungh... ahh... ungh ahh.... Ya~ me~ te~”

Yi Hang, “...”

Lu Yanbin turned it off and played another one. This time, the voice was filled with desire. “Mmm ungh... Not so hard... Ahh... Do you like it? ......Ungh ....Fuck you ...Ahhh ...Does it feel good? Mmm? Ungh.....”

Yi Hang, “=口=”

Yi Hang asked weakly, “When did you record it?”

“Yesterday you didn’t turn it off so I copied it to my phone.” Lu Yanbin looked at him calmly. “Now you see the difference.”

Yi Hang remained silent for a moment and became even angrier. "Then why didn’t you stop yesterday when I said that I knew how to moan?”

“I saw that you were feeling good so I didn’t want to stop.”

“...” Yi Hang gritted his teeth a long time, his cheeks flushed. He was feeling so ashamed and quickly turned to look around, lest they be overheard. But as soon as he looked around, he immediately roared angrily, “Zheng! Xiao! Yuan!”

Qi Le originally wanted to help a certain someone get his wife home, but he saw that they had begun to confront each other and wondered if he could run away. He slowly shuffled towards the main building and secretly observed at the same time to make sure they didn’t pay attention to himself, then accelerated. At the moment, he had already escaped pretty far. He immediately ran when he heard him. With the advantage of such a distance, he wasn’t worried about losing him.

“Damn it!” Yi Hang immediately began to chase him. “Zheng Xiaoyuan, stop right now! I haven’t settled accounts with you yet. What did you say to the idiot doctor?! It’s like he’s on steroids!”

Qi Le didn’t answer. He quickly ran into the main building, took several turns, and successfully escaped. There were 12 floors in total and so many classrooms. He didn’t believe that the idiot could search them all, one by one.

When Yi Hang ran to the main building, he found that the man had disappeared. He couldn’t help gnashing his teeth and sitting resentfully on the steps in front of the main building, preparing to wait for the man to finish class. Lu Yanbin slowly walked over and looked down at him. “Let’s go home.”

“No,” Yi Hang sat motionless and waved him away. “You should go to work. Don’t mind me, I’m not a child.”

“Let’s go home. It’s not really safe outside.”

“This is a school. Do you think a car can still make its way here, slam into me and kill me?”

Lu Yanbin was silent for a moment and subconsciously wanted to say something, but then he heard a certain someone whisper. “It’s better if I die so that I can finally ascend to heaven and go to the place where I should have gone. That’ll save me the trouble of giving gifts to someone. Not only did he throw it away in front of me, he even pinned me to the bed. Poor me... Bok choy ah.... Yellow in the ground ah....”

Lu Yanbin, “......”

Lu Yanbin finally compromised, “I won’t throw it away. I’ll put it away, ok?”

“Why are you putting it away?” Yi Hang looked up at him. “I bought it for you. Oh, don’t delete the audio. I’ll send it back to the manufacturer and get them to change it. Use that next time then.”

“I don’t think that it’s as good as you.”

“...” Yi Hang said, “Who cares about you? Anyway, I won’t say that sentence again until you’ve managed to get me to fall for you. I won’t use my hands to help you with that either... It’s up to you. Either hold it in or use that.”

“It’s fine.” Lu Yanbin looked down at his phone and played another audio. Someone was shouting at the top of his voice, “What wrong with it? That’s how it’s supposed to be! Don’t give me your weird logic again. I don’t know how to, unless you fuck me again... Wait, what are you doing?”

“No, it’s not this one” Lu Yanbin closed it, quickly played another one, and seemed to have hit replay. “Fuck me again, fuck me again, fuck me again...”

Yi Hang, “=口=!!!"