Chapter 187: 🔒Ruthless Kindness (2)
༺ Ruthless Kindness (2)༻
Lizzy looked around with a pale complexion on her face, taking in the scenery around her.
Beyond the room, she could see doctors bustling about, and nurses followed behind them to assist.
Fortunately, the door and numerous windows left open had prevented a severe claustrophobic episode.
“The doctor diagnosed that it was necessary to administer antibiotics to your body for at least three days. So, three days from now, when your body stabilizes, you will accompany me to carry out the execution of the death row inmate.”
“……”
Ferzen’s voice was as dry as ever. Most likely, he was the one who had brought her here.
Lizzy, realizing this, bit her lip, struggling with the emotions rising deep within her heart, a mix of sadness and indignation.
“Why did…”
“……”
“Why did you bring me here…?”
Lizzy had read the memories of both Roer and Cesar through their corpses.
She knew that her survival didn’t align with Ferzen’s intentions.
As someone who had wished for her death more than anyone else, why did he bring her to the doctor instead of leaving her to die alone in her bedroom?
The hypocritical act, which could hardly be called kindness, disgusted Lizzy.
“Do… A wretch like you… Finally feel… Guilty now?”
“Managing the unit’s personnel is a superior’s duty. But I’m sure you’re not expecting me to answer such an obvious question.”
Ferzen uncrossed his arms and took a step closer to Lizzy.
“Do you find it strange that I feel guilty?”
“Then—!”
Lizzy was tempted to counter Ferzen with a question. If he was someone who could feel guilt and knew how to be compassionate, why did he ruthlessly destroy her family and her home?
“If your family asked me to kneel, I would kneel. If they wanted an official apology, I would give it to them. If they wanted material compensation, I would give it willingly… But… It was your family that rejected all of those compromises. Or do you expect me to bow my head and wait for you all to tear my throat out?”
“Your very premise, starting with offering such compromises–!”
“Between uncertainty and certainty, humans almost always choose the latter. I am not saintly enough to take the initiative and apologize for my past mistakes.
Even if it means that I will die without receiving forgiveness, I will accept it with a repentant heart.
Have you ever seen a cornered rat calmly surrender itself to a cat? You are the one who chose to run in the opposite direction from me, so why are you blaming me for the consequences?”
Creak-!!
Ferzen bent down and put his hand on Lizzy’s bed. Then, he moved his face closer to her.
In response, Lizzy reflexively used her hands to move away from him.
But before long, the hard walls of the hospital room stopped her pitiful struggles.
“You said it was strange for me to feel guilty, didn’t you?”
As his voice resounded with exceptional clarity, his large hand firmly grasped her chin, preventing her from turning her head.
“Heu, heuk……!”
Lizzy’s lips quivered as she emitted a moan mixed with an ugly hiccup.
“The reason I didn’t just leave you in that bedroom was because I felt guilty. As you expect, I do wish for your death. However, just like your late brothers, I want it to be your choice. I wish that you would die without making the guilt that has needlessly curled up in a corner of my heart grow bigger. In short, I want you to commit suicide. I hope you end your life with your own volition and choice.”
This is the final desire I have for your Claudia family.
That’s why I brought you here instead of leaving you in your lonely bedroom.
…… As soon as Ferzen finished speaking, Lizzy’s once beautiful face twisted to the point of appearing grotesque.
From her contorted and ugly countenance, tears of sorrow streamed down and moistened the back of Ferzen’s hand that held onto her chin.
It was indeed absurd for him to audaciously request anything of her. The deaths of her brothers hadn’t provided him with the slightest bit of satisfaction, and the idea of her ending her own life brought him no closer to happiness. It felt as if her stomach was churning.
Herself, her family, her house.
To what extent should they continue to serve as toys for his amusement?
“I-I will not die……”
“……”
“I will never… ever… let you feel comfortable… I won’t leave you alone!”
Lizzy stuttered these words, filled with spite, as she held Ferzen’s hand, which clamped her chin, with her delicate, outstretched arms.
There were indeed instances where people got hurt while playing with their toys. Lizzy resolved to, at the very least, ruin Ferzen’s amusement, even if it was only once.
She would endure this useless and unsightly existence to the end, becoming a thorn in his side that would torment him for eternity.
Ferzen, however, upon hearing her words, whispered in Lizzy’s ear with a cold and cruel smile.
“Do as you please. But can you bear to watch me have children with my wives and live a happy family life, something you so desperately desired? Will you endure watching a life that’s no different from living hell? Given your shared blood with those traitors, no one will want to associate with you. After hiding away in a desolate corner, can you endure witnessing a brilliantly shining world without turning away?”
It was truly absurd.
I know better than anyone that you aren’t that strong, Lizzy.
“Heu… Keuk…”
The enemy of her family.
The main perpetrator who destroyed her life.
Her inability to do anything while he taunted her brought a painful sense of frustration.
“Furthermore, if you don’t take your own life, I will continue to show you kindness cloaked in hypocrisy, just like this time.”
Typically, Ferzen detested such actions. However, he believed they held no significance anymore and simply caressed Lizzy’s neck gently.
And at that horribly gentle touch, Lizzy shuddered and started to have trouble breathing.
It was evident that what Lizzy felt against her skin was an extremely warm touch, but for her, his touch was like a sharp blade ruthlessly slashing at her face.
“By being kind to you solely for my own satisfaction regardless of your volition, I will gain comfort that will erase the guilt that is sitting in the corner of my heart little by little.”
If that happens, those around him would surely praise him for being a caring and compassionate person, as the object of his kindness was none other than the family of traitors.
“To put it simply, Lizzy, even if you choose not to kill yourself, your existence will only become a catalyst that turns my two faces into something indiscernible.”
Once he could forcibly plant the root called Lizzy, use all the guilt that had taken place in his heart as nourishment, and finally crush her to dust as she withered away…
When that time came,
“There will be no one in this world who would dare to call me a villain.”
“Ah… Heu… Ah… Aaahh… Uwaah…!”
Her purple eyes became increasingly unfocused.
The sight of how irregular her breath had become, as if her throat was clogged by something, even though no one was strangling her, clearly showed just how pitiful she was.
How come both dying and living did not offer a clear hope to her?
Even if she became a thorn of sin that threatened his heart, she thought that, just like what he had said, she would be the one to crumble first.
Lizzy was so scared and terrified of every word he had uttered just now.
It would be far better for a sheep to be dragged to the slaughterhouse as it could bleat as soon as it felt its impending fate.
Wasn’t her current circumstance akin to being dragged to the slaughterhouse together with her entire family, forced to watch her family being slaughtered, and then left alone on a ranch in a state that was neither living nor dying?
Even if her toenails and fingernails were all worn out and bloodstains littered the walls, Lizzy could only curl up and shiver inside this monster’s ranch from which she could never escape.
“Keheuk…! Keu… Heu… Huee…!”
As Ferzen saw Lizzy’s pale complexion and how ragged her breathing had become due to the mental shock, he forced his finger down her throat.
Soon after, with a burst of breath, the gastric juices from her empty stomach came up and trickled down from the corners of her mouth, staining her pure white clothes.
But rather than frowning when he saw her like that, Ferzen just quickly wiped his hands and took Lizzy into his arms.
“You need to take a shower.”
“Heuu… Ahh…”
At the same time, his actions proved that everything he had said before was not just empty words.
As he clutched her IV holder, Ferzen started to walk slowly.
Since the bathroom allocated for patients was not far away, it didn’t take long for Ferzen’s steps to come to a halt.
Creak-!!
Soon, it would be just the two of them.
When the door leading to the bathroom, where no one’s gaze could reach, opened…
Lizzy remained trapped in Ferzen’s arms, anxiously extending her hand toward the doctors and nurses passing by.
Tak-!!
However, no one extended their hands toward her or looked at her.
Like being grabbed and dragged by a monster from the abyss, Lizzy was forced to enter the bathroom in Ferzen’s arms.
In a place with no one else.
On top of that, a place where no one’s gaze could reach—the ranch of a monster called Ferzen.
She was there.
Alone.