Chapter 87: The Villainess (4)
It has been a month since Moyong Sang-ah heard news of Kang Yun-ho.
Moyong Sang-ah was swinging her sword in her personal training ground.
“Miss, it’s already been a month. Please, have a meal now.”
The leader of Changbongdae had been watching her train for a while and, as the intensity of her training decreased, he spoke loud enough for her to hear.
“I have no appetite.”
With that single sentence, Moyong Sang-ah boldly scattered poison in front of her, as if facing a matter of life and death.
“You’ve hardly eaten properly for a month now, focusing only on martial arts training. You’ll harm your body.”
Since that day, Moyong Sang-ah had hardly touched food, dedicating herself solely to martial arts training.
“Didn’t I say I have no appetite?”
How could she swallow food when her actions caused her husband to suffer even in death?
It’s better to spend time on martial arts training. Moyong Sang-ah continued to swing her sword, aiming to cut down as many Demonic Sect members as possible when the time comes.
The leader of Changbongdae looked at his lord with a look of pity.
Since hearing the news about Kang Yun-ho, Moyong Sang-ah has been running wild, relentlessly pushing herself like a horse being whipped without rest.
The servants, with worried faces, told him that Moyong Sang-ah was not getting enough sleep.
Even the strongest horse will collapse if it runs towards its destination without eating or resting.
She seemed unconcerned, but it was clear to anyone that her body had significantly weakened. However, no matter what the leader of Changbongdae said, she showed no intention of resting.
A way to stop her lord.
Reluctantly, the leader of Changbongdae decided to take drastic measures.
“Tomorrow marks a year since you were married. The late Kang Yun-ho would not want to see you like this.”
“What would you know about my husband…!”
Moyong Sang-ah, overcome with emotion, stopped her training to retort.
“That day, Master Kang Yun-ho had taken sleeping pills in advance. He wouldn’t have done so without knowing he was going to die. This means, doesn’t it imply that you two had discussed something before leaving the Moyong Family?”
“……”
Moyong Sang-ah looked down, avoiding the leader of Changbongdae’s probing gaze.
“I don’t know what was discussed between you two that night. However, if my guess is right, Master Kang Yun-ho would never want to see you like this.”
At first, he thought it was a brilliantly successful strategy. The death of Kang Yun-ho brought a great turnaround for his lord, Moyong Sang-ah.
But what if it wasn’t a strategy but a man’s sacrifice?
Kang Yun-ho’s guards weren’t hastily fleeing but waiting for Changbongdae to follow.
If a man, confirmed to lose everything, gave his last breath for a woman, if a fiery love between a man and a woman created this situation.
Then he understood why his lord changed like this.
“There’s no time to waste in continuing his will.”
“Was Master Kang Yun-ho’s will for you to exhaust yourself to collapse? A man who sacrificed himself for his beloved woman wouldn’t say such a thing.”
The leader of Changbongdae spoke with conviction to his lord.
“……”
Moyong Sang-ah remembered the words her beloved had said that night.
-Survive.
-Take back the Moyong Family and, when it’s all over, place a flower on my grave.
Was she truly living?
Moyong Sang-ah quietly looked at her body. Compared to a month ago, it was definitely more emaciated. A body living more to die than to live.
Could she truly honor his will and place a flower on his grave with such a body?
“…… Leader of Changbongdae. How goes the search for my husband’s grave?”
“We’ve sent more people to Joseon to track down who took the body. There will surely be good news.”
She must find his grave. With this body and condition, she’d collapse before she could reach his grave.
“…… I’ll have dinner tonight.”
“Really? Then I’ll have someone prepare a delicious meal.”
“Suddenly eating something greasy might cause trouble. I’ll have porridge today.”
“Are you promising?”
“Yes. I promise.”
Because she couldn’t collapse yet.
“Since the miss has promised, I’ll take my leave now.”
Feeling the firm will in Moyong Sang-ah’s eyes, the leader of Changbongdae left her personal training ground.
The next day. Late at night, close to midnight.
Moyong Sang-ah had her servants prepare a vast array of exquisite delicacies.
Since she usually ate little, the servants were puzzled by her order to prepare so much food but were happy to prepare the meal late at night, knowing she had resumed eating after having stopped for so long.
“I don’t need anyone to serve me during the meal. Everyone, please leave.”
She dismissed all the servants who had laid out the food, as per her command.
Time passed, and it was beyond midnight.
Moyong Sang-ah began to open all the windows in the room once the sound of others faded away. Although spring had arrived, a chilly wind still blew from outside.
She took out a hidden item and placed it in the middle of the table set with delicacies.
Written on the item she placed was:
Divine Scholar’s Prefectural Deity.
Kang Yun-ho.
What she had taken out was a spirit tablet for offering rites to a deceased husband, placed by a wife.
Today, just past midnight, was the day of an unforgettable night between Moyong Sang-ah and Kang Yun-ho.
It also marked the first anniversary of Kang Yun-ho’s death.
She placed an incense burner next to the spirit tablet and lit incense to honor the deceased. The gentle fragrance intended to honor the dead began to fill Moyong Sang-ah’s room.
She poured wine into a cup for her husband, offered a bow towards the spirit tablet, and then spoke.
“I’ve prepared food for you. Foods that are hard to find in the Central Plains, famous foods from all over Joseon, I’ve prepared them all.”
The food laid out for Kang Yun-ho’s memorial service included delicacies that some might never taste in their lifetime.
No other memorial service could offer better food than this. It was a service anyone would affirm as such.
Yet, she could only offer a sorrowful smile as she looked at the food.
“Though I miss you so, I don’t know a single food you liked.”
Among these many foods, was there any that he liked in life? Would he be disappointed at the memorial service seeing none of the foods he liked?
Would he have liked any of these foods? Moyong Sang-ah was unsure.
If there were anyone who knew what he liked, She would want to ask them, but no one who knew what he liked was left in this world.
All because of her.
“I’m scared. My husband.”
Moyong Sang-ah began to confess her innermost thoughts in front of her husband’s spirit tablet for the first time in a year.
“My brother still firmly holds power. The Demonic Sect is expanding its influence from within the Moyong Family. The elders of the council are too greedy to see how the Moyong Family is decaying.”
A situation of despair and unavoidable despair.
Her only hope was what her husband had left behind. But the more she used what her husband left, the more she acted maliciously, the more the finger-pointing towards her increased.
“I’m not afraid of being pointed at. If it means driving out the Demonic Sect, I can step over such finger-pointing. I’m not afraid of driving out the Demonic Sect. As long as this body lives, I will continue to pursue my goal. I’m not afraid of such things. What I truly fear, the thing I fear the most…”
Moyong Sang-ah could not bear to look at the spirit tablet and bowed her head.
“I’m scared of not meeting you in the afterlife.”
A noble man wronged by death.
The villainess who killed him.
The villainess’s sins were deep and would only deepen further.
Would the noble and the villainess end up in the same place?
“Even if my whole body is torn apart in hell, that’s fine. Even if my whole body burns, that’s fine.”
Her sins were so deep that the most painful place in hell was surely destined for her.
If it’s a place she must go because of her sins, she could go there no matter what.
No matter the punishment, it didn’t matter.
Just one thing.
If only one wish could be fulfilled.
“I just want to see your face once more.”
She was willing to accept any punishment.
Even if she had to bear an eternal punishment, she would accept it willingly.
So.
“It’s okay if you look at me with a cold face. It’s okay if you spit out your anger. It’s okay if you curse me. It doesn’t matter what. Please, I just want to see your face once, just once.”
Tears started to flow from Moyong Sang-ah’s eyes as she sobbed with her head bowed.
A painful longing constricted her heart.
“I want to see your face. I want to hear your voice. I want to ask for your forgiveness… I want to beg for your forgiveness.”
It didn’t mean she wanted to stand before him and be forgiven.
The sins she committed were not the kind that could be forgiven.
How could a villainess, who couldn’t confess her sins even in her last moments, hope for forgiveness?
If she had to enter the hottest place in hell, then she wished it would be him who made that judgment.
“If I could see your face just once more, no matter what punishment you give me, I will accept it with a smile.”
Just as his last was her, she wished her last to be him.
Moyong Sang-ah stood up after offering another bow towards her husband’s spirit tablet.
Would he come here? Would he like the food she prepared? Or was he not coming because he has heard everything in the afterlife?
Even as she prepared his spirit tablet, offered food, and bowed, Moyong Sang-ah was afraid.
Whooosh.
A warm spring breeze entered the room from somewhere.
A warm breeze that didn’t match the chilly weather.
The breeze slowly circled the room and then began to ignite the flame of the incense, turning it red.
As if signaling that someone had arrived.
“Could it be… is it you, my husband?”
She murmured with a trembling voice.
The dead visited their own memorial service to enjoy the food prepared by the living (hunjang).
The breeze, as if responding to her call, flamed the incense a bit more and then warmly enveloped Moyong Sang-ah.
If it was him coming, she shouldn’t show a weakened appearance. She needed to show that she was living, not dying.
With a tear-stained face, Moyong Sang-ah managed a strained smile.
The warm breeze tenderly touched her tear-soaked face and then quietly disappeared.
“My lord…”
Was it really him? She hoped it was.
If he came to this place knowing all he sins, if he comforted this cowardly woman before leaving.
It would mean he was waiting for her in the afterlife.
Moyong Sang-ah carefully drank the alcohol she had offered to her lord.
Eumbok. The food visited by the dead was said to contain their energy, bestowing blessings on the living.
“Please wait for me, my husband.”
The liquor she drank on an empty stomach burned through her stomach and veins.
A memorial service was ultimately an act of honoring the deceased while giving the living the strength to move forward.
The warm breeze that had caressed her tears, the energy he left behind flowing through her entire body.
She had gained the courage to keep moving forward.
On the day when Moyong Sang-ah began to move forward again.
“Lady! We’ve received a message from the dispatched Changbongdae. Most of the 5th unit of Changryongdae have been annihilated! Those among the survivors who were caught practicing dark martial arts committed suicide on the spot!”
The leader of Changbongdae reported to his lord with a pleased expression.
“That’s good.”
“They’re asking what to do with the remaining ones.”
“Bribe or torture them to confess what they know, and then kill them all.”
“They’ve refused to be bribed, and most have already refused to speak. I’ll tell them to try once more before dealing with them.”
After finishing his report, the leader of Changbongdae left Moyong Sang-ah’s office.
Once the leader of Changbongdae had departed, Moyong Sang-ah gazed at her left hand.
On her left hand was a ring, a symbol that she would forever remember her departed husband by.
“It’s only just beginning.”
She had established a base of support and finally managed to reduce her brother’s influence, even if only by a little.
She didn’t know where the end would lead, but she wouldn’t stop now that she had begun.
“Please watch over me until the end, my love.”
The villainess caressed the ring on her ring finger, her resolve strengthening.