The Best Director

Chapter 150: Invitation and Acceptance

Wait, I’m a teacher, I have a wife and kid, OK?” In the brightly lit audition room, the short-haired Bradley Cooper looked on with a face full of surprise, glancing at the frowning Ed Helms next to him and said impatiently, “I can pretend to see nothing, but I won’t help you smash a police car.” Ed Helms seemed quite indifferent as he replied, “Alright, I’ll do it.”

The bearded Zach Galifianakis asked seriously, “Do you need help?” Ed nodded, “Yeah, thanks.” Bradley supported his back with his hands and grumbled, “I gotta see how you plan to do this?”

Wang Yang rested his chin on his hands while sitting behind the office desk, silently watching their performance. After attending Tom Willing and Jamie White’s wedding, which was not grand but was cozy and quiet, the newlyweds went to Martha’s Vineyard to honeymoon, and he swiftly began the task of finalizing the main cast for “The Hangover,” immediately contacting these three guys through various channels and inviting them to audition for the lead roles in the new “R-rated comedy film.”

Whether it was chubby Zach, or Bradley and Ed, they were all extremely astonished. Pies falling from the sky? This was a main role audition! Moreover, they were actively invited, and the person sending the invitation was none other than the incredible Wang Yang! Zach, who could only play extras and small roles, Bradley, who couldn’t even land small roles, and Ed, who had never appeared on screen, all excitedly accepted the invitation.

It’s simple, you pour kerosene on a ferret, light both ends, and then throw it in…” Zach Galifianakis said with a straight face, making hand gestures, as Bradley and Ed looked on cluelessly.

Wang Yang couldn’t help but smile as he watched. The trio’s acting abilities were quite good, free of unprofessional stiffness or dullness. It was not surprising; they were either drama school graduates or had rich stage acting experience. Perhaps because of this, their physical movements could sometimes be excessive, but this slightly exaggerated style was perfectly suited for comedy.

Additionally, the characters’ temperaments matched their own very well. Maybe they weren’t like this in real life, but on screen, they could be said to be playing themselves, resulting in a strong chemistry. Of course, they weren’t flawless, but this wasn’t about gunning for an Oscar, and there wouldn’t be any profound scenes in the movie. Their level of acting was already sufficient.

Well done, guys,” Wang Yang clapped his hands vigorously after the trio finished their performance, deciding not to throw another acting prompt at them. He beckoned to the three of them, took out three sheets of white paper and pens, and handed them out, saying with a smile, “You know comedies have to be funny, directors need to be funny, and so do actors. I want every cell in the crew to be funny, breathing in plain air but exhaling laughter.”

All three nodded with a smile, and Wang Yang continued, “So I have a question here, write your answer on the paper.” He smiled before posing the question, “Imagine there’s a live tiger in the presidential suite that you guys stole. Now you have to add another animal, what do you think would make it funnier and more entertaining?”

Bradley and the others immediately looked thoughtful, as the answer could directly influence the audition outcome and their entire acting careers. They had to be cautious. Watching them ponder, Wang Yang spread his hands with a laugh, “Don’t be so serious, once you’re serious, you won’t be able to be funny anymore. Guys, be funny! Use all your funny cells!”

Heh, I’m thinking…” “OK!” “Feels like submitting a final thesis.” All three revealed a smile, seemingly relaxed, but they still took a good while before each wrote their answer and handed it back.

” “OK!

Wang Yang first looked at Zach Galifianakis’s answer, reading aloud, “A monkey, why?” He looked at Zach, asking with interest, “Why a monkey?

Bradley and Ed also looked at him with smiles, while Zack with his bearded chubby face put on a serious expression and explained, “Monkeys are inherently funny animals, some dare to tease tigers, tapping their heads or grabbing their little buddies, which is really amusing.”

Alright,” Wang Yang nodded with a smile, appreciating the funny man’s flight-of-fancy and crude humor, but finding it genuinely entertaining. He then opened Ed Helms’ answer, which read “a Hello Kitty (real cat or large stuffed animal),” and couldn’t help but chuckle before asking, “Ed, why Hello Kitty?”

It creates more conflict,” Ed Helms adjusted his glasses and replied with a smile, “When you place a fierce tiger next to a cute Hello Kitty, there’s an ironic charm. If the tiger were to do something… on top of Hello Kitty…” Everyone burst into laughter, and as Wang Yang opened Bradley’s answer, he said with a grin, “That’s interesting, but we don’t have the rights to Hello Kitty.”

Bradley’s answer was “Rabbit, or chicken.” Wang Yang smiled and gestured for him to explain. Shrugging, Bradley said, “Well, if you steal a tiger, you need to feed it, right? Rabbits and chickens are good choices. A hen walking around in the Presidential Suite seems very much in the spirit of absurdist humor.”

Hmm, that’s a sensible line of thought,” Wang Yang put down the paper, noting that Bradley was calm and logical, and such analysis could often yield many laughs. He looked back and forth at the three of them, knowing that a day and a half wasn’t enough to fully understand their comedic potential, but they had done exceptionally well in the future ‘The Hangover’…

They were the ones! Standing up with a smile, Wang Yang spread his arms and declared, “Guys, let’s take Las Vegas by storm!”

What?! The three looked at each other, their faces a mix of shock and joy, hardly believing they had just been cast as leads in a multimillion-dollar movie. The miraculous Yang?! Trying to contain his excitement, Bradley asked for confirmation, “You mean we passed?”

Of course!” Wang Yang nodded and said with a laugh, “But buddy, from today on, don’t cut your hair or beard. I want to give you a new look.” He then turned to Zack, “Zack, you too, I need you to have a longer beard! And Ed, you’re fine just as you are.” Zack happily agreed, “I’ll throw away my scissors when I get home! Hahaha, I’m so happy!”

Both Bradley Cooper and Ed Helms laughed uncontrollably with excitement.

A few days after the auditions were settled, knowing they’d be acting alongside a live tiger, all three signed the formal contracts without hesitation, each with a salary of 600,000 US Dollars—a very generous sum for actors previously unknown in the film and television industry. The opportunity was worth far more than 600,000 US Dollars; they would have accepted even if it had been 100,000.

On February 5th, Wang Yang celebrated his 22nd birthday amidst joy, receiving countless wishes and gifts. The strangest gift was a set of playing cards mailed by Natalie, to which he protested “half-jokingly” on the phone, “You’re fobbing me off with a deck of cards?” Natalie calmly responded, “I have a Natalie Herslag I could give you. Do you want it?” Wang Yang suddenly became very satisfied, “Yes, that’s a deal then, and not a single dollar for your new movie’s payment.”

On the 14th, it was Lunar New Year’s Eve. He returned to San Francisco to celebrate the Spring Festival with his family, resting for two days before diving back into the adventure of ‘The Hangover’.

During this time, ‘District 9’s’ second round of viral marketing made new progress. The “Alien Research Center’s” one million person cosplay event was fully reached, revealing the basic information about this alien race—a hive society that takes pleasure in destruction, arson, and violent crimes; they were the bad guys! And the “Secrets of the Aliens” letter-finding campaign organized by movie fans was also successfully completed, confirming the fact that ‘District 9’ was indeed a slum, with the aliens placed right in the middle of it.

All these new details had the sci-fi fans feeling curious and excited. Aliens forced to live together? What was the story really about, and what kind of person was the protagonist played by Robert Downey Jr.? What was his relationship with the aliens? What was the history and current state of human society’s interactions with aliens? To find out, one would have to crack the third round of viral marketing websites “Humans and Cimex” and “MNU Employee Handbook”.

In the midst of the heated viral marketing, post-production and special effects for “District 9” were also proceeding apace. Wang Yang, in addition to checking and reviewing the completed shots every week and either expressing satisfaction or providing feedback for changes, left other tasks, such as seeking other special effects companies to work on certain effects, to the special effects team and the visual supervisor.

Meanwhile, “Sweetheart,” slated for an April release, had completed the fine cut stage and was moving on to scoring. The 105-minute theatrical release was naturally a result that Wang Yang was happy with, and he had personally edited a portion of the scenes. The film’s promotional campaign was also making headway, following a more traditional approach with Anne Fletcher, Jessica, and other main creators appearing on magazine covers and in interviews, along with exciting trailer advertisements.

Mixed in with all these tasks was the work of assembling the cast for “The Hangover.” Of course, Wang Yang didn’t bear the burden alone, hiring several producers with whom he had pleasant previous collaborations to assist, but their task was “fast, fast, fast”!!!

The actual pace was indeed quick for two reasons. First, “The Hangover” didn’t require an all-star cast – funny and fitting was enough; and second, the location was Las Vegas, meeting post-9/11 movie production standards. More importantly, he wasn’t a greenhorn, having built up his own connections and team over a few films. Now, just with the promise of generous financial backing, he could easily rally a group together.

The Hangover,” not being a big-budget production, with its entire story set in the real world, meant that set designers and prop masters didn’t have much work load, eliminating the need for lengthy preparation time to construct sets and props; the only set to build was the presidential suite bathroom, since the Caesar’s Palace Hotel refused to allow a tiger inside.

However, Wang Yang spent more time on selecting and finalizing the cast than on assembling the crew. The groom, Doug, would be played by Matthew Fox, the lead “Jack” in the upcoming TV series “Lost.” Before that, he had starred in Fox’s sitcom “Party of Five”, but with no renewal of the series in the past two years, he had been out of work and fairly unknown in the film circle, commanding a fee of 300,000 dollars; the role of stripper went to Charlize Theron, who was the highest paid person in the film with 2 million dollars; and Michelle Rodriguez, as the gang leader, for 1.5 million dollars.

Wang Yang had met Michelle Rodriguez at the Sundance Film Festival back in 2000 and had maintained a casual friendship with holiday greetings since then. In the intervening years, she had established herself as a new generation of tough female icon with roles in “Fast & Furious” and “Resident Evil.” When invited to take part in a comedy movie, she was surprised and thought it was an early April Fool’s joke.

Once she was certain he was serious, she asked with curiosity, “Why? I don’t seem funny.” Wang Yang replied, “I don’t know, it’s just an idea that popped into my head, then I thought ‘interesting’! The crazier this movie is, the better. What do you say, want to give it a try?” Without hesitation, Michelle shot back, “Can I refuse an invitation from the amazing Yang?”

Equally surprised was Charlize Theron. Her screen image was always serious and her films often dark. A comedy? She had never tried it. Though it was unlikely to win her awards, she and her agent quickly agreed, because “a movie by ‘the amazing Yang’ equaled high box office, a social phenomenon, and increased fame.”

Oh, wow, of course I’m interested!” bellowed Shaquille O’Neal from the other end of the phone, filled with extreme surprise and excitement. He laughed heartily, his voice booming as he said, “I absolutely love performing, I should be in entertainment! Whatever you want me to do to be funny, I can do it!”

Sitting on his living room couch, Wang Yang couldn’t help but chuckle. Anyway, Shaquille was bound to be more hilarious than Mike Tyson. On the phone, he laughed, “That’s very exciting to hear! Big guy, rest assured, this time we’ll let your comedic talent shine. Next, you’ll be swamped with film offers, retire from the NBA early, and then all the Lakers fans will curse me out.”

Shaquille O’Neal laughed heartily again, eagerly asking, “So I’m just playing myself? I can act however I want?”

Wang Yang said yes, with a chuckle, “But I’ll give you some ‘professional direction,’ such as whether to glare or wiggle your butt…” He suddenly thought of something, his eyes lighting up as he said, “I think it would be really fun for you to do a dance. You know, a big guy like you, if you can move with agility and flexibility, the visual effect would be fantastic.”

No problem, no problem at all, my dance moves have always been great! Shaquille O’Neal said with pride. Wang Yang laughed and said, “Cool!” They chatted for a while longer, confirming the cameo appearance and plans to attend a game at the Staples Center to support him, then ended this call.

Wang Yang immediately dialed another number, leaning comfortably against the sofa cushion. As soon as the call connected, he greeted with a laugh, “Hi, Will.” Will Smith answered with enthusiasm, “YOYO, Yang, good evening!” After exchanging greetings, Wang Yang told him the purpose of the call, “Will, you know I’ve been preparing to shoot an R-rated comedy film recently, right? Yeah, it’s not about the ‘Oscars’ this time, just for fun. I want to invite you to do a cameo for a small role.”

Sure!” Will Smith readily accepted. Whether it was their deep friendship or the favor from “The Pursuit of Happyness,” he had no reason to refuse the invitation. He asked with a laugh, “MAN, what kind of role is it?”

Wang Yang wasn’t surprised by Will’s quick agreement; he felt only expected calm and gratitude, laughing as he said, “Oh, don’t worry, I’m not going to make you bare your butt, haha! It’s a hapless little drug dealer, you’re free to interpret and shape him however you want, just make it funny! And there’s one more requirement, you have to speak as fast as rapping.”

YO, that’s my specialty, I can talk as fast as a plane, non-stop, like a machine gun…” Will jumped right into an impromptu rap upon hearing this. Wang Yang laughed out loud, saying, “I definitely don’t have that talent.” Will chuckled and joked, “But playing a drug dealer is new for me, I’ll need to study his mindset closely, who knows, maybe I can bring home another Oscar.”

They both laughed, chatted a bit more, and then Will Smith extended an invitation, “When are you going to come over to my place? Jaden really misses you, he’s asked me so many times ‘Where is Yang? Why doesn’t he come play with me?”‘ Wang Yang also felt a wave of nostalgia for that smart and clever kid, laughing, “I miss him too. How about I come over and bother you guys tomorrow?” Will replied with warmth, “Welcome!”

After this enjoyable call, Wang Yang took a sip of beer and picked up the handset to continue dialing numbers. Halfway through dialing, he had a thought and decided to call Christopher Nolan instead, laughing as he said, “Hey, Chris! So, I was thinking of inviting you to do a cameo in my new movie.

A cameo?” Nolan sounded surprised, puzzled as he asked, “As a director or as an actor? I can’t act if it’s the latter.”

Wang Yang chuckled, “I knewyou would refuse, so never mind, Chris, see you later!” He laughed as he hung up the phone and then called Jonathan Nolan, the screenwriter of “Memento,” instead. He often contacted Jonathan these days, seeking advice and discussing ways to give “The Hangover” an unexpected twist in its suspense tactics.

Hi, Jonathan, good evening…