Lustful Paradise

"Because... I.." Lucifer was lost for words. He had no idea how to comfort her while staying true to himself at the same time.

"Because it was the right thing to do." Vanessa's soft voice came from beside her as she covered the distance and sat next to the sobbing girl. "It was the right thing to do. No matter what happens, how much you might feel hurt because of it, learning the truth will always be better than living with false hopes."

"No!" Gwen shouted at Vanessa in anger, then turned toward Lucifer again. "Why don't you understand? I knew about your affairs, and I stayed away from confronting you, thinking that this day might come when you leave me... but I still lived in my imaginary world with you. All because I love you."

She paused to wipe her face, and her tears ran through her fingers like tiny streams of hot water, pouring from her puffy eyelids. She tried to keep her voice from shaking, but her voice cracked despite her efforts. "Do you... want to free yourself of me? And throw me away, like I am some old toy you're tired of playing with?"

Hearing those words, Lucifer pulled her hand, drawing her into his tight embrace as if he wanted to absorb her pain. "Who said I want to throw you away? If I really wanted that, why would I be here? Why would I tell you all of this face-to-face?"

"Don't ask me about your motives. I have no idea what goes inside a cheater's mind." Gwen cried into his arms, sniffing hard before pushing her head off his chest and looking into his eyes with her misty ones. "You said you love me... Did that mean nothing? Did all the moments we spent mean nothing to you?"

"Of course, it was meaningful." Lucifer stroked her face, then gave a quick glance at Vanessa. "But the love I felt for others also meant something. Every person that I fall for has a unique quality to themselves. That's what draws me in and makes me lose my head over and over again. It's not that I don't care for anyone or am trying to be the bad guy. I'm just... helpless at this moment in my life. Being honest with you is the only way I know how to deal with things."

"That still doesn't make it right." Gwen slapped his hand away from her cheek and looked at him with a scowl. "I won't be able to forget and forgive this. Cheating is cheating, whether you are honest or not."

"Perhaps. But do you know what the meaning of cheating is?" Vanessa cut in, making Gwen turn her head towards her and focus on her face. "Cheating is when the one who you love with all your heart betrays you and doesn't come clean about their other relationships. Cheating is when someone wants to have their cake and eat it too by lying to multiple people. Cheating is when you just enjoy yourself and never think about the pain it causes others. But I don't think Lucifer falls into any of these categories."

Vanessa's words made Gwen speechless as she fell silent for a few moments, not knowing how to retort to that statement. However, before she could find a suitable comeback, Vanessa continued her speech.

"I admit, having feelings for someone else while you're already in a committed relationship isn't something easy to accept. It hurts the ego. It makes you think of yourself as unworthy or uninteresting, and it's extremely painful. But look at Lucifer. He was honest with everyone, including me. And we had a conversation about whether I would be okay with his situation. His openness gave me the chance to choose for myself."

Gwen lowered her gaze and sniffed, her mind spinning. She felt confused, angry, and hurt at the same time, with each emotion fighting for dominance in her heart. "B-but he didn't tell me about you or anyone else beforehand..."

"Because he wanted to tell you in a respectful, mature way." Vanessa cut her mid-sentence. "All of us have feelings and deserve to be treated with respect. I'm sure he was worried about how to approach you, not wanting to hurt you, and that's why it took him so long to decide when the right moment should be. And what did you expect from him? Do you think he was going to ask for your approval or something before falling for someone? No way. He had to make the choice first and then present it to you afterward."

Gwen bit her lower lip and wiped her eyes to clear her vision, allowing her to see the superstar again. Vanessa's face was full of compassion as she leaned closer to put a hand on Gwen's and asked, "Tell me, Gwen. Didn't Lucifer always love you with all his heart? Weren't the moments you shared together special? Or do you feel his love for you has faded? If it hasn't, then isn't that enough for you to forgive his mistakes?"

These questions struck deep within her soul. Although it angered her that Vanessa was the one making these arguments and not Lucifer himself, there was nothing wrong with what she said.

They were valid points that made sense, especially considering Vanessa had known about his other women from the start and still accepted him despite it. But even though her mind understood this reasoning, her emotions refused to be tamed.

Even if he was truthful with her now, how could she ever trust him again after he had already broken that trust? Wouldn't it be easier just to end things here, saving herself from all future heartbreaks?

'Can I even do that?' Gwen questioned herself, feeling a jumble of mixed feelings surge inside her. 'Should I really do that? To have nothing to do with him from now on? Can I... l-live without him?'

A small voice in her head whispered no. The answer was obvious. There was no way she could cut ties with him, nor did she want to. Because what she wanted most was him. He was her world, her lover, and her first in many ways.

So, if ending things between them wasn't possible for her, was there any other option left?

Gwen looked into Lucifer's eyes and asked in a weak, sad tone. "What are you going to do after this? If I were to say that I am fine with your situation... would you let me stay by your side?"

"What am I going to do? What kind of question is that?" Lucifer chuckled, as if he couldn't believe what he was hearing. "Of course, I'm going to keep you in my embrace like I always do. No matter what you decide, I won't leave you. You can try to run, but I'll catch you. You can try to hide, but I'll find you. Whatever you do, whatever choice you make, I'll never stop loving you or lose the desire to hold you in my arms until the day I die. And do you know why?"

He leaned in, pressing a soft kiss to her forehead before continuing, "Because you are mine, and I am yours. Nothing will ever change that."