Chapter 1800: Wild West-Styled Tavern Fight
Chapter 1800: Wild West-Styled Tavern Fight
Once we finished eating our meals, some annoying bastards came to, well, annoy us. It was a typical cliché in these Wild West settings where a cowboy is minding their own business an some thugs come to annoy him and a fight breaks out.
"If you got so much money why don't you share some of that food with us, eh?"
And then another cactus man approached to the other side. They were clearly grabbing their guns as if threatening me.
So, as a fervent lover of Wild West movies, I decided to happily go along with the cliché because I really felt like beating some fuckers up.
It was nice that in this Trial everyone was so tough, so I could go all-out without having to worry of splattering them into pieces with a single blow!
"Sure!" I said with a smile.
As they thought I was going to obey, suddenly.
BAAAM! BAAAM!
Two fists landed on their faces, blowing them away.
"There's your first fucking meal."
As I smiled back at them, suddenly, the rest of the thugs eating here all jumped on me.
And a huge tavern fight broke out...
Yes, it broke out instantly.
Not only the two thugs in front of me, but there were a dozen more guys that jumped on me instantly.
"Oi you fucker!"
"What did he do?!"
"You motherfucker, come here!"
"I'll beat that handsome face of yours!"
As I confronted them, I laughed.
"My, thank you for calling me handsome, but I don't like men!"
I kicked the imp-faced bastard in the head and blew him away, he landed on a table and broke it, groaning in pain.
"You fuck!"
The cactus man from before quickly punched me on the chin, it hurt a bit.
"Hah, that ain't going to work."
I smiled back at him, kicking his stomach and then grabbing him, throwing him into the ground and then crushing him with my own weight.
CRASH!
"AAAGH!"
As he broke out some of his bones, he quickly pulled out is gun and pointed it at my head. "Eat lead you bastard!"
BANG!
As he shot a bullet, I enhanced my senses, rapidly grabbing the bullet midair and reinforcing my hands to take on the blunt force equal to divine items.
"Those shabby bullets ain't going to work on me, fucker!"
I kicked his face again and then with my claws, I sliced apart his hands so he wouldn't pull the trigger anymore.
"Aaagh! My hands!"
"Don't worry, they'll grow back, you're a cactus... right?"
"No they won't!!!"
"Ah my bad, then I guess your gunfighting days are over champ."
I stomped his head down until he fell unconscious.
However, the rest of the thugs didn't stand there, three more were attacking me from behind, trying to punch me down.
This time, however, they weren't going to catch me off-guard as I enhanced and reinforced my body to its limits.
"What? I had no idea I was your damn punching bag."
I smiled back at them, as I quickly opened my jaws and grabbed one of them, a burly, red- skinned demon, biting his hand and tearing it off.
"Uuaaaggh!"
His blood sprayed everywhere, as he screamed in agony and ran away.
Good, run away idiot.
"Now who else wants to taste my fists? You first, cactus fucker?"
There was a fatty cactus man covered on hard spikes.
"I bet you can't hurt me! My spines will shred you to pieces before-"
"I don't give a fuck!"
ВАААМ!
With all my force, I punched him so hard he popped like a balloon, turns out all the fattiness was air, he flew away as all the air came out of his body.
"s-Shit...! Don't move!"
Suddenly, I heard someone screaming at me, as I noticed there was someone, a green- skinned bastard holding a gun and pointing it at the head of Drakda.
"Or I'm shooting your damn kid! Now strip bare and give me everything you've got!"
"Hah... I wouldn't do that if I were you, my kids... They need little protection, if any."
"What? What are you even talking abouuuuaaaaggghh!"
CRUNCH!
Before he could even do a thing, Drakda bit his hand off and ate it with the gun included.
"E-Eh? EEEEH?!"
The alien screamed in horror, confusion, and agony as he saw Drakda munching on his hand and gun and then swallowing them both.
And burping.
"Raaarrr!"
"You're all damn freaaaks!"
As he roared at him, the man sprinted faster than any man I've ever seen in my entire life, running out and leaping off the window.
The other thugs were already unconscious and missing a few pieces of their bodies as Benladann and Miranda beat them up.
"Alright, we're done here I guess." Said Benladann, throwing away a half-unconscious guy she was holding with her hands, by grabbing his head.
"Pieces of shit won't let us eat in peace," said Miranda. "Throwing the other guy into the
trash bin."
As I nodded, I quickly looked back at the restaurant, it looked like a damn mess, food splattered everywhere, several tables and chairs broken, holes on the walls and broken
windows.
I noticed the dog girl that served us trembling in a corner, looking at us in utter horror and disbelief, the cook, which seemed to be the owner, who seemed to be her father as he was also a similar-looking dog man with even the same color patterns on his fur, stepped out.
"My restaurant! W-What happened here?! A tavern fight? Wait, Henrietita, my daughter!
Where are you?!"
He ran out and found his daughter trembling in the floor, which he quickly hugged, trying to
calm down.
Goddamn it, now I feel bad.
"Ah, sorry about that... We were enjoying the food and out of nowhere they picked a fight with us," I explained. "They were even going to shoot us so..."
"S-So this happened because you ordered too much food..." the man sighed. "You have to
understand that things are harder nowadays... they thought you were provoking them like
that!"
"We were truly hungry though," said Miranda, crossing her arms. "Anyways the thugs are beaten anyways... Let us repair your shop at least."
"R-Repair it?" he asked.
"Yeah, like this," I nodded.
FLASH!